You Fucked A Hooker In Amsterdam
We met at a study abroad program in Europe and I know that we both had at least some idea that this was a romance wrapped up in the excitement of our temporary situation, the fact that I had a boyfriend in the states (scandal!), and our shared passion for the availability of all the strong and copious amounts of drugs that the Netherlands had to offer.  
And  while I acknowledge that the entire time we were courting we were both on mushrooms and covered in face paint, and I  think that your first pick up line had something to do with you jokingly requesting  a hand job, when you told me you were going into Amsterdam to visit the Red  Light District, I assumed you’d be innocently boozing with your friends  at a sex show and thoughtfully bringing me back a vagina-shaped lighter.  Unfortunately, I had to terminate the possibility of continuing our  tryst stateside when you nonchalantly revealed your most recent foray into the unconventional pastimes offered by the Dutch. You fucked a hooker. 
 You. Fucked. A. Hooker.
They say that every time you have sex with someone, you’re basically having sex with all of the people that that person had sex with. Thanks for bumping my number up to 1 million.  
-Written By Samantha

You Fucked A Hooker In Amsterdam

We met at a study abroad program in Europe and I know that we both had at least some idea that this was a romance wrapped up in the excitement of our temporary situation, the fact that I had a boyfriend in the states (scandal!), and our shared passion for the availability of all the strong and copious amounts of drugs that the Netherlands had to offer.  

And while I acknowledge that the entire time we were courting we were both on mushrooms and covered in face paint, and I think that your first pick up line had something to do with you jokingly requesting a hand job, when you told me you were going into Amsterdam to visit the Red Light District, I assumed you’d be innocently boozing with your friends at a sex show and thoughtfully bringing me back a vagina-shaped lighter. Unfortunately, I had to terminate the possibility of continuing our tryst stateside when you nonchalantly revealed your most recent foray into the unconventional pastimes offered by the Dutch. You fucked a hooker. 

 You. Fucked. A. Hooker.

They say that every time you have sex with someone, you’re basically having sex with all of the people that that person had sex with. Thanks for bumping my number up to 1 million. 

-Written By Samantha

  1. isthisyournikki reblogged this from dealbreaker and added:
    BAHAHHAHAAA
  2. thatskindabadass reblogged this from dealbreaker
  3. aprilrludgate reblogged this from dealbreaker
  4. where-ducks-go-in-winter reblogged this from dealbreaker
  5. ifaslila reblogged this from dealbreaker
  6. thelocococo reblogged this from dealbreaker and added:
    Deal-MAKER.
  7. nuclearphysics reblogged this from dealbreaker and added:
    I guess our plans to meet up in LA are off then?
  8. topofthewur said: gurl u just jealous and u know it
  9. yeareary reblogged this from dealbreaker
  10. nedhepburn said: sounds like shes jealous for not having sex with a hooker.
  11. coffeeforone reblogged this from dealbreaker
  12. dealbreaker posted this